Blog

One month in Jinja

Well, I have officially been in country for a month now. I’ve picked up on some of the local language and know my way around town… more or less. I can ride on a boda sitting sideways with a box of bananas and bags full of other things while the driver maneuvers the potholed roads and I try to hold on when I can. I am learning the names of the boda guys who hang out down the street and I have my favorite places to get street food from (which I never thought I would do) 

Days go by and sometimes I’m left spinning and then some days I feel are so long it seems like it’s been two. It’s funny, I’ve been here a month and part of me feels like there is no way it’s been that long and other times when I’m walking around town and talking to the boda guys in their language I feel as though I’ve been here forever.

Tonight we celebrated the birthday of one of my friends, who also happens to kind of be my boss. I sat at the table with 10 people or so and I wanted to cry. These women who have become part of my community here, who I’ve gotten to know and spend time with. Sometimes I have to take a step back and look at my life for what it is…. 

Every night I go to be and I think to myself, “what did I ever do to live this life?” The answer: nothing!

I sat with some friends the other night and I said “I think that saying goodbye after 6 months here will be harder than saying goodbye when I left home”. I then immediately felt guilty for saying that. 

As I started to talk with them I said a lot of things, one of them being that I don’t want to leave. Am I still in the honeymoon phase? Maybe but I don’t know. 

Not a day goes by where I don’t miss something from home. Whether it’s family, friends or some convinces I took for granted. I miss being able to drink water out of the sink. If I have forgotten to fill up my water filter and I’m thirsty I have to wait to drink safe, clean water. The biggest thing I miss right now is being able to wash my hair standing up in a shower. Who would have thought that something so simple would be something I miss.

I hate that when I get sick I freak out because I have to think about things like malaria, parasites and infections instead of just knowing it’s probably the flu. But that is life here and it’s not easy or simple but it makes you appreciate more of what you used to have. It makes me slow down and enjoy life more. I get excited in the store when I see peanut butter is in stock. I have taken pride in the fact that I’ve learned how to make passion fruit juice and light a flame lantern. Life here isn’t easy or simple but it’s beautiful.

For me, life follows one set of rules, Love God, and Love people. And then doing whatever else I need to do. Loving people is huge though. As I wrap up my first month in this country I have learned so much. And I’ve learned that there is a plethora of new information I still need to tap into.

0

Searching for Hope

Today after my fun, eventful and somewhat emotional day at the Sole Hope outreach house I headed home down my mile long pot hole ridden road. First thing I did was wash my hands. They had become quite gross after playing with playdough, sticking my hands in soapy water so I could catch bubbles and tossing around balls that we covered in red dirt. As soon as I had finished I noticed my bracelet was gone. My leather bracelet that said “Hope” on it. I had worn it just about everyday since the beginning of the year and even almost every day since I got it 3 years ago. So I hoped on a boda, went back to outreach and searched. I retraced my steps on my mile long ride home. Looking in the dirt and on the side of the road. I started praying “Lord, I know this is silly but please let me find it. I know you can make the impossible happen.” I walked all the way home and in my head I was trying to come to terms with it being ok if I didn’t find it. I was literally searching for hope. And I finally said to myself “well if someone else has it then maybe it will be the same reminder to them as it is to me, to always have hope”. You see, Hope has been my word. It keeps coming up, and I mean everywhere. Life is hard but just have hope. Things are confusing but just have hope. I have hope. Hope for the future, hope to make a difference in the world and hope that the mean and nasty things in life will pass. I cling to hope because when the walls seem to be falling down around you, you need to have hope that you will make it, you will survive.

Living in Uganda, hope is a powerful word. It can move mountains, it can breathe life. It can change you. Many days I find myself looking for hope when I’m faced with the lack of comforts. When I see a level of poverty that no one should bare. When I feel like throwing in the towel and giving up on the hard things. When I have to say goodbye to the kids I have fallen in love with the last two weeks.
But hope is never lost. It’s usually just temporary misplaced. I walked into my room accepting the fact that my bracelet was gone and hopefully someone else was enjoying it when I saw it. There on top of my laundry drying rack was my bracelet. I must have taken it off last minute before walking out the door. Funny though, if you asked me if I put it on this morning I would have said yes. Heck I would have bet 100$ that I did. But there it was. My heart nearly exploded. I’m not a “things” person, I don’t have a lot of trinkets or excess but this bracelet has reminded me and taught me many things.

Never give up hope, even when it seems like a lost cause. So as I went to bed last night my heart was full. Full from the days events, full from the craziness that come from living in Africa and full of Hope.

I had to lose my bracelet today to realize how much I needed to keep searching for hope even when I don’t think I can.

0

Quiet mornings

I love quiet mornings in Jinja. They start around 5am and they end shortly after at around 7:30 or if you are lucky 8am. The moments when the world is still and all you hear is the sounds of the various animals and birds roaming around. I love these moments because while my experience here has forced me to feel like I’m moving in slow motion the hustle and bustle seems to be moving as though it was recorded in a time lapse video. The days fly by and I’m often laying in my bed exhausted and yet I feel like I have done nothing.

The weekend was great. It was restful and it was a reminder that even in these times where I constantly trying to pull myself out of quick sand that if I just remain still and gain my full strength it will be easier to pull myself out. I’m not sure if that makes sense but that’s how I feel.

So I woke up this morning, hopped on a boda and went to town to drink a coffee and get ready for the day. To remind myself that the things that I find to be minor frustrations like slow internet connections or power outages really can’t effect me unless I let them. Living life here is not hard but it’s challenging. It’s different. More so than I could ever explain. And while there are things and common convieniences I miss from home, I wouldn’t trade any of them for this experience. 

I went to church yesterday, at a home church. While at first I was hesitant to go I realized it was exactly where I needed to be that day. The message was intended for my heart and ripped it wide open. I’m still recovering from the wound. Yet it was during that message where I realized how stubborn I truly am. Most people who know me know I am a go with the flow, laid back person. I am not easily frustrated about things I cannot change. But what people often don’t see is when it comes to personal growth I’m the most stubborn person probably on the face of this earth.

I like to fight with myself. Which when you think about it is ridiculous. Because in a fight there is a winner and a loser and sure I may win but I also lose, and the pain that comes from losing is much greater than the triumph of a victory. 

So it is my goal this week to let go. To give it all up to God. My life is not in my control and I need to accept that. I feel like I’m lost here, trying to figure out why this door was flung wide open and yet I need to remember to be still. Sit in the quiet of the morning and lean not on my own desires but those of the one who brought me to the place my heart so desired to be in for so many years.

0

When the power goes out

June 29th, 2017

As I was in the middle of writing a blog post about being sick the power went out and since my computer had no battery juice and I couldn’t see the keys I needed to type on I decided to leave my little introverted bubble under my mosquito net in my room and come out to the general living area. This week we have been staying in the Sole Hope guest house. It’s been a bit of a different but also wonderful experience. This means that we share a common living space with the other members who are staying at the guest house.

When the power goes out here there are 2 options really, one is some kind of better operated light and the other is a paraffin gas lit lantern. I knew that Miriam, my new friend who is one of the caretakers of the guest house at night, would be lighting those lanterns soon and this time I wanted to help. So, I walked out of my bedroom and sure enough she was there gathering lanterns that were scattered around the house to light them.

Miriam cracks me up. Since staying at the guest house I have found myself chatting with her for sometimes up to 45 minutes or an hour almost every night. She always says I make her crazy. Her way of saying I make her laugh a lot. She told me the other day that I am so funny and it is good because funny people stay young. Which I completely agree with. I think in the craziness of life we all forget to laugh. I don’t mean the kind of laughing where you chuckle under your breath. I mean the kind of laughter that makes your stomach hurt. The kind where you are engaging your stomach muscles so much you almost lose control of your bladder. I laugh everyday like that here and at the same time I cry everyday here too. It’s a beautiful and yet crazy place to be. Yet it is the richest feeling of life I have ever experienced.

I sat with Miriam on the floor and held up my flashlight so she could see what she was doing to light the lanterns. I don’t know if many of you have experience with gas lanterns but they are no joke. They are finicky and mean sometimes and they smell HORRIBLE. After an hour of lighting lanterns and placing them around the house we were finally done. We had fixed 3 lanterns that didn’t work because the wick had fallen down into the bottom and had to be rethreaded. We also had a minor run in with a small fire because of one of the lanterns acting up. It really makes you appreciate the things we have back home and how we usually never experience power outages. Here, the power can go out any day, anytime and for any amount of time. You really never know. Then after about 30 minutes after all the lanterns were lit the power came back on and we blew them all out. Remember what I said in my previous post about God having a funny sense of humor?

0

Beginnings of week 2

Wednesday June 28, 2017

Sorry it’s been awhile since I have really written anything. Life has kind of caught me off guard and I feel like I’ve just been soaking up this new place I call home.

I will say though that the last two days have been a little rough. I felt homesick for the first time since being here earlier this week. Probably because I was sick and let’s be honest… no one likes getting sick away from home.

I woke up Tuesday morning with a runny nose and a little bit of a sore throat but by the time noon rolled around I was wrestling with a whole new kind of monster. I decided to take a nap. Hoping that the added rest would whip me back into shape. Two and a half hours later and I was sick as a dog. I laid in bed and I couldn’t move, my body felt broken. My head felt like it was going to explode and I knew I had a fever because I was shaking and cold even though my body was warm to the touch. My roommate, Emily came in to see if I was up for the trip into town to go to the immigration office for a special pass we have to get in order to work here and I looked at her and said, there is no way I am getting out of this bed.

I laid there and in the back of my mind I kept telling myself, “you are ok, it’s just a cold. This is totally normal, you are just acclimating to the new germs here”.  I woke back up again at around 5pm and I wanted to cry. My body felt the all too familiar feeling of what it is like to shut down. The feeling I experienced 3 years ago the last time I was here and the months that followed my return home from this country after my first trip. Tears started to pour out of my eyes. “Why God, why?” These were the only words I knew how to muster. Then like a wave it hit me. I am indeed in Uganda again. The place I wanted to return to after 3 years of trying to kick down doors. The place where after being so sick the first time I told people I would gladly return again even if it meant being uncomfortable.

So, that’s where I was, uncomfortable. I had been holding on to the fact that I was here but all my walls were up because I was afraid to truly experience it. I was afraid that like the last time the rug would be pulled out from underneath me and I would fall on my broken knees again and not be able to get back up this time. I cried for people back home I missed because I hadn’t yet. I had not yet let go of home. I had not yet fully allowed myself to submerge into this new life, I kept waiting to wake up from this dream.

It may sound odd but when I laid sick in bed it was like a part of me was dying in order to be free for the life I will have here. I’ve often felt God move in mysterious and sometimes weird ways but one of those ways is during my moments of being sickness. When I get sick, I get really sick and it brings me to my knees in a place of surrender. I laid in bed with my mosquito bites and my broken body aching with a fever and I thought “That’s it, I’m not even here for 2 weeks and I have malaria.” Yet, I didn’t want to be the person who overreacts so I waited it out.  “Lord, help me. Show me, move me, break me”. So, He did. My fever broke and yet another wave overwhelmed me. I began to sweat and I began to cry. My body still too weak to hardly anything I laid there rejoicing because my fever broke and that meant I was now on the mend.

I can’t explain what it is like to get sick in a place that is not your home. It is one of the most terrifying things I think I have ever experienced. You don’t know if it is just going to be a cold or flu or if it is the beginning of something bad. When you are living in a country where it is fairly easy to get sick with something that turns bad fast you really have to know your body and whether or not you need to go to the doctor to get tested. I was close this time but I was determined to not make a habit out of this whole “Am I going to die in Africa” thing. I was completely and utterly miserable but I also knew that maybe this was a sign that I needed to slow down and get some things off my chest. So, I did.

I am feeling much better now, all that remains of me being sick is a runny nose. For those of you who know me well I HATE the sound of people blowing noses. I don’t know why but it grosses me out. But yet again another thing that has gone out the window here because I’ve been having to blow my nose every 15 to 20 minutes. I like to think that our God has a funny sense of humor. So many days I sit in my bed at the end of the day and I laugh or smile I think, “ha, if I had just done this the easy way I wouldn’t have had to go through that”. I guess that’s what happens when you are as stubborn as I am though.

0

Is this really my new home?

I sat there staring off into space when all of a sudden in my line of vision a spider drops down to the ground from the roof I was sitting under. I watched this spider play tag with another one that was close by. One would run out in front of the other and then the second one would chase it to catch up. They started jumping and before I knew it their game of tag turned into a game of leap frog.It’s funny, I’ve always had a fear of spiders but for some reason I wasn’t afraid. I was actually quite amused. I watched this spider game while I sipped on a freshly brewed cup of coffee and I just started to soak in the atmosphere.

It was weird. Am I really here? I mean it felt like yesterday when I was talking about just coming to Uganda for a few weeks this summer and now I am going to be living here for 6 months. How does that even happen?

After I finished I hopped on the back of a boda boda and rode to town. I sat trying to keep my balance thinking I would fall off. What do I hold onto, my purse, my phone my sweater or the bike? As we curved around turns and streets that were all so unfamiliar it started to rain. Sweet soft drops began to fall on me. Lightly dusting my glasses with baby dew drops. 

We stopped at a little cafe to get lunch. It’s the mizungus favorite place to go apparently. Here I was eating a chicken Caesar salad. Breaking one of my rules(don’t eat any vegetables that aren’t cooked). A rule I have learned from my previous travels. Because of the water and the cleanliness I have always been told not to eat fresh fruits and veggies unless they have a peel. But oh well, here I am eating a salad. I did make an effort to chew it really good though in case it came back up later if you know what I mean. Then, we walked down the street. As it started to rain harder and harder I felt my spirits lift. It feels right. I feel home. Surely a little out of place but I know I will settle in to that soon enough. For now I am just in awe of the emotions that lay just below the surface.

After our outing we got back on a boda and rode in the rain back to the Sole Hope compound. This time the rain wasn’t just small spouts of mist, they were full on big drops that filled the road with murky red puddles. This time I decided to hold onto the bike. We hit a bump and I had to put my foot down because I almost fell off. So I readjusted, held onto the back of the bike with two hands and prayed that I wouldn’t fall off. I kept thinking! This is it….This is where I belong. Still trying to find my bearings in this new place but it feels “right” already.

So now I sit in my new home soaking it all in because it still hasn’t hit me that I will be living here for 6 months.

0

Starting the next chapter.

I woke up at 4am this morning to get ready to get all my things packed in the car and head to the airport. As my alarm went off I immediately thought about turning it off and just sleeping in a bit longer. But as I rub my tired eyes I pulled the covers off and thought, well in a few hours I’ll be on a plane sleeping. It can’t be that bad. 4 hours of sleep really hits you hard when you’ve been on the road traveling for the last two weeks. I packed up the car and headed to the airport. 

These last two weeks have been unreal. I got to spend them on a road trip visiting family with my mom, one of my sisters and our dog Tyrone. As we drove from state to state I couldn’t help but to feel overwhelmed. Not because we spent numerous hours in the car or the fact that I had one day to pack once we returned. I was overwhelmed by the beauty of the places we drove through and saw. My heart was so full. And just when I thought it couldn’t get better, it did. We drove over 3,000 mikes, spent more than 50 hours in the car and saw 9 states. All within the period of 13 days. 

I got to see the salt flats, Salt Lake City and  Arches National Park in Utah. I got to see beautiful mountainscapes and have a snowball fight (which didn’t last long because the altitude killed me) in Colorado. Driving through the grass plains or Montana and Wyoming looking at the Rocky Mountains in the distance left me at loss for words. I imagined what it would be like to get lost in those fields and spend my days riding horses or writing stories. Then we drove through Yellowstone National Park at sunset and it was something I’ll never forget. The sky was painted the most marvelous colors and at each turn and bend in the road I begged my mom to pull over so I could take another picture. Yet no matter how many I took it never felt like enough because an image cannot capture the beauty that was in front of me. The colors almost seemed to speak as I watched in complete silence. They radiated to my soul and touched a part of me so deep it moved me to tears. I have been so busy with school and work for so long I forgot what it felt like to soak in the beauty of this life for every drip that it has to offer.

As we drove to Idaho we finally hit the home stretch. Had a nice relaxing time with family and got to spend some quality time with my grandparents. It was there that I was reminded that “tears coming out of your eyes only makes your vision clearer”. As I sat during several conversations trying to hold them in. After Idaho we drove to visit my grandma in Seattle. It is basically my home away from home. Except I haven’t been there in 4 years. Except that the last time I was there I was going to my grandpas memorial service. Except that I sat at the kitchen table every meal waiting for him to come around the corner but he never did. I was quiet and exhausted  during this part of the trip, but it took me awhile to figure out it was because I missed my grandpa. I missed his witty humor and his half smile as he tried to get away with some snarky remark. 

Our trip came to an end as we headed back home to Petaluma! I would have 24 hours to pack and get ready to leave for 6 months. And that is just what I did.

So back to the airport…. I arrived only to find out my flight had been cancelled and instead of leaving at 9:30am I would be leaving closer to 2pm. I had to go to a different terminal on the other side of the airport and wait 3 hours before I could even check my bags and go through security. Then I would have to wait almost 4 more hours before my plane would leave. And, on top of that I would no longer be flying with the other intern but completely solo the whole way. 

I stood staring at the ground for a minute, my mom asked me if I was ok and I started laughing. “Oh, I thought you were going to cry” she said cautiously. “Nope, it’s funny. This whole thing is funny! Really, it is what it is, no reason to get worked up about things you can’t change.”

So, we waited. The time finally came for me to go through security and as I hugged my mom I looked at her and she had tears welling up in her eyes. “What!?! You are crying?!  Stop it!” I exclaimed as a last ditch effort to keep myself from losing it totally. It didn’t work. I walked through security with tears rolling down my cheek and stepping into the next chapter this life has started to write for me.

The chapter where I move to Uganda for 6 months. The one where I will be in the country where I feel home and at peace but so very broken and vulnerable. The chapter where I fly all by myself, not knowing anyone in the other side. The one where I completely dive head first into the unknown because of faith and hope! 

As I sit in front of my gate, trying to stay awake for fear of falling asleep and missing my flight, I feel more emotions that I know how to express. I’m excited, anxious, nervous, happy and a little bit scared. But it’s ok because I’ve been waiting for a day like this for 3 years and now it’s finally here. 

So, Uganda here I come! 

0

Chase the Undertow

I felt the pebbles squish between my toes. It was a weird sensation at first but soon enough the rocks became like tiny shards of glass. Seemingly so small that if you were to stand still on them you could feel the hundreds of tiny pin pricks caressing the bottom of your foot. The only relief was to run as fast as you could on the balls of your feet so you could avoid the tiny pin pricks, at least momentarily. So, that’s what I did, I ran. I run when I feel stuck sometimes. It was as though I was running away from the pain that I had been holding onto. The pain that this season of life has tried to hurt me with. The heartaches, the tears and the fears of jumping into the unknown. These were the tiny glass shards that had been taking over my life and left me agonizing in pain. Instead of standing still and letting the rocks dig their way in, I took off as fast as I could until my lungs were bursting with the cold damp air I was breathing in. The same cold air that was making my hair stick to my face as though it were wet. I looked back towards the water and saw the sun setting. It was so peaceful. so moving. It was almost as though I could hear it whispering to me. The last sunset on a beach that I would see for at least the next 6 months. I watched the sun set over the large sharp boulders in the distance, hugging them tighter and tighter until it disappeared. Reminding me of the sun setting on this season of my life too. Soon I will be boarding a plane and headed to a different country on the other side of the world; away from every comfort I have ever known.The sun now hiding behind the rocks in the distance left the sky painted with deep hues of pinks, blues and purples. The kind of artistry that one only hopes to see in their dreams.

I turned to look at the ocean and the waves began to thunder and boom louder and louder. It was so powerful I could feel it in my chest. A sound I had learned to find comfort in but also one that made me realize how small I really was in the world.

“watch out for the undertow”. I instantly remembered that being said about this beach. It was a name I learned to fear as a child. The beach has always been my safe place but when you heard there was an undertow it had the tendency to make everyone stand on edge. It was the kind of fear that no one acknowledged but you knew it was there. The kind that makes your hair stand on edge. It wasn’t safe. 

An undertow is when the current below the surface is flowing in the opposite direction of the that which can be seen. It has a tendency to create a break in the shore, causing a steep drop. I stood staring, mesmerized to see the water thrashing about. Then I saw it. It looks as though it took the form of an enormous foot. Stomping upon the shore with a mighty force and then dragging it back out to the deep sea. If you get caught in the undertow I imagine it must be something like being trampled by a giant.

But what happens if you are too afraid of something to take the chance and get your feet wet. I used to be that kind of person. Too afraid of something to take a chance, a leap of faith. Too afraid to get closer to the ocean and face the unknown. As I stood staring at the undertow I began to walk forward. With each step I felt the small pebbles once again turn to glass beneath the bottoms of my feet. I stood still until the wave slowly crept up and gently kissed my toes. There I stood in the midst of pain facing my biggest fear. Do I run towards it and get my feet wet or do I run back up the beach? Time stood still as the decision lingered in my thoughts, mulling over what to do. I saw the water reside, and the next wave forming on the horizon. Surely this one is big enough and if I don’t move it will get my feet wet. I must choose to embrace it and tackle it head on or start running away again. 

So, one foot in front of the other I began to run. I ran without holding back. I ran as though my life depended on it. I knew that if I didn’t run without holding back than I might stop and I couldn’t let myself do that. But this time I ran into the water. With each step I watched my feet plunge into the water and step on to the unknown. As I ran it splashed up on my face and I felt free. As my feet faded into the sea the pain started to dissipate.

Isn’t that how it is in life though? Aren’t we all constantly facing pain, trials and hardships? No person suffers the same thing but it all affects us in similar ways. Whether I ran towards the waves or away from them I would still be standing on the rocks that were attacking my feet. If I ran up the beach I would be safe. Where I’m comfortable. Where I know where my feet will land. But if I ran towards the water I’d be walking blind and facing my fears. Yet, it was the very act of facing the unknown and my fears that offered the relief of the soothing water. 

If we take more risks and tread on more unfamiliar waters we would find that there a lot more people who are willing to take the same chance. The same leap of faith. If we run away and stay with what’s normal we risk never getting to know if facing our fears is indeed what makes us stronger. 

The water soothed my feet as it slowly began to turn them numb. Though, this allowed me to walk the entirety of the beach without feeling the sharp rocks drill into my feet. As I walked to the car I felt each and every poke and pin prick but this time, it didn’t hurt. A result from facing the undertow, from facing the unknown. It can be scary but if we are willing to risk it we might come to learn that the things we find in those moments are the things that help us cope during the hard times. During the moments where we are in so much pain we want to give up. When we feel like the world doesn’t understand. It allows us to feel the pressure because life will never be easy and it will always have bumps along the way but it will help us know how to process the pain better and learn to walk in it. In Order to tread through this life, we were all made to run towards the undertow.

0

Why Uganda? Why Sole Hope?

Alright y’all I know I already have a blog but I decided to start a new one because I’m starting a new chapter in my life and this blog is going to be related specifically to that.

So as many of you know I have decided to say yes to an internship that will land me in Uganda for six months with an organization called Sole Hope. This blog will be my journey on the way there and my way of keeping in touch and updating you guys on my life while I am there.

First of all, I wanted to share my story and how this all came to be, because well, I think it is pretty exciting.

Well, it actually all started 3 years ago. I read a book called “Kisses from Katie” and the next thing I knew I was on the phone with someone I had never met and telling her to save me a spot on her trip because I was going with her to Uganda. I spent two weeks during the Summer of 2014 in a country that would forever leave an imprint on my heart.

While in Uganda I got really sick, like really, really, sick. Upon my return, I was still sick. I had multiple trips to the Emergency room and UCSF as well as a 3 day stay in the hospital. I was planning on returning to Uganda summer of 2015 but my health wouldn’t let me. I was wrecked. I wanted nothing more than to return to the country that I fell in love with. Everyone knew it, you could read me like a book. It was all I talked about. My conversations were filed with tears and a deep longing to return.

I kicked and screamed and tried to kick down all the doors I could to get back, but nothing opened, all the doors were sealed shut. Locked tight and not budging.

Then an opportunity came up for me to go to Kenya with my church, so I jumped at it. It was an amazing trip and I met some amazing people and I plan on staying connected with them but it wasn’t quite the same. Uganda felt like home. Kenya was a small little drink to satisfy my soul and to build relationships and connections that will last for a lifetime.

So, here I am, on the cusp of graduating and I decide to do my senior project on an organization called Sole Hope. A friend of mine had introduced me to them during a “Shoe Cutting Party” during the summer of 2015. Since then I have had a pulling on my heart strings towards this beautiful organization and all that they do (I’ll get into that later). Last year I saw an application to apply as an intern but it conflicted with school so I had to deny myself the desires of my heart and turn it down.  I was crushed. But if I knew one thing at this point, it was that I was done trying to break down doors. I wasn’t going to waste my time and energy trying to make something happen that wasn’t going to happen.

So what happens? I contact them saying I’m interested in volunteering for a longer period of time while I will already be over there this summer. I start trying to figure out how to plan my month-long trip in Uganda. I sent a Facebook message to the person in charge at Sole Hope asking about volunteer opportunities. And the next day I hear back from them saying that they literally were just talking about opening a room in their intern house for someone to stay June through December and that if I wanted it, it was mine.

There it was, my door, it had flung wide open and this time I didn’t even have to knock. I looked in and saw everything I had been fighting for was basically being handed to me saying “here, its yours, just walk through the door and you can have it”. I knew the day that message was sent that I was going to say yes, but my stomach was in knots because six months is a long time to be away from all my friends and family I have here.

On Monday last week I was presented with the opportunity, Wednesday I had a skype call with some more people in charge at Sole Hope and Thursday I said yes to spending 6 months in the country that my heart had longed to be in for 3 years. So, that’s my story. I am going to Uganda for six months. Am I excited? Heck yes, just getting through school is going to be a challenge because my mind is already there. Am I scared/nervous? Also, heck yes. I am already waking up in the middle of the night thinking “wait I need to remember to pack…” and it’s still 4 months away.

So, with that I say “Uganda here I come”. 3 months til I return to the red dirt that stained my feet 3 years ago, a stain that I have been trying to scrub away every day since I returned. Yet, no matter how hard I have tried, I never could. Guess its ok though, because soon again my feet will be in that red dirt and I have a feeling that it’s something I will never be able to get rid of.

 

1

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑